I Hate Cheyenne - Part 8. Final.
Human Clauses August 12th, 2007The biggest irony of all: Cheyenne claims to be in graduate school to study sexual ethics.
As for Marl, he never responded to any of my e-mails. I saw him at a party once and he couldn’t look me in the eye. I recently found out he was present at another party I attended but hid from me the entire time. And this was all after I told him revenge was beneath me and that I wasn’t going to hurt him. What a coward. What a worthless excuse for a man.
After this exchange I saw Cheyenne several more times to pick up mail from my old address. We have seen each other in the flesh perhaps four times since I found out about her and Marl.
But with therapy and time, all of my old feelings for Cheyenne which formed over our two year relationship have finally died. I regret our entire relationship and I regret my attempts to bury the hatchet with her after the break-up. I am finally able to see the instinctive wisdom in my original reaction of “I hate you and I never want to see you again.”
I sometimes think about why the break up bothered me so much less than discovering her betrayal. Now I know why:
I had only seen the good in Cheyenne and had created a fantasy of who she actually was. The Cheyenne I had wanted to marry was the one that was “nice” and always had a smile for everyone. She was a person of deep compassion and cared about others. Any guy would be lucky to have a woman like that.
But reading those e-mails to Marl murdered the woman I loved. The real Cheyenne is a hypocritical slut who has never been in the real world for a second. She is completely immature and selfish and uses a smile to get what she wants from other people. She is terrified of confrontation and will go to elaborate lengths to avoid responsibility in relationships.
Cheyenne is also a disgrace to feminism because she uses feminist theory as an excuse to do whatever she wants and fuck whoever she wants. If a man ever acted the way she does she would find it disgusting.
I was so close to buying her that engagement ring she was always nagging me about. I dodged a bullet. On my deathbed I will be begging for those two years back. Cheyenne, I hate you.
End of Part 8. End of the whole story. Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7
(3 votes, average: 5 out of 5)
Loading ...9 Responses to “I Hate Cheyenne - Part 8. Final.”
Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.
August 13th, 2007 at 9:11 pm
Very interesting story!! You kept me hooked!
August 13th, 2007 at 9:15 pm
Very interesting! You kept my interest for all 8 parts!!
September 7th, 2007 at 2:11 pm
I hate you and the horse you rode in on
September 8th, 2007 at 12:50 pm
nah I’m kidding you should slash her tires
December 10th, 2007 at 9:59 pm
Been there man. a very thin line between love and hate.
Story: was engaged to a woman with law degree, I was a cook making 950 an hr. we were living together. I grew up very poor and learned early that I must work hard for anything. Her: affluent. private schools, riding lessons etc.
we were living together. I was working two jobs, very long and hard hours. she decided to quit work “to find herself”.
she told me once that she was embarassed to tell her legal collegues what i did for a living. can you belive that? she did so many rotten things to me. cheated, stole money from my acct. i wasnt perfect, but it is amazing what one human being, that says they love you, can do to another. I truly hope that love really exsists out there. love where you can be vulnerable and trust entirely. that sanctuary that we all need. but, im starting to think that its just something that debeers and hallmark sell us.
December 19th, 2007 at 8:17 pm
if this is the worst relationship/breakup you ever go through, you’re lucky. seriously. get over it. i was expecting to find some kind of story where she cheated on you, or was abusive, or stalked you; instead, your complaints about a (not particularly long!) relationship are that she a) had sex with you too soon; b) was a feminist (you repeatedly refer to her views as “bullshit” and to her as a “slut,” which makes me think that if she thought you were sexist, she was probably on to something); c) carefully timed breaking up with you (welcome to the world of dating, buddy. breakups are usually thought-out, discussed with friends, and timed); d) slept with somebody else after you had broken up; and e) didn’t tell you about her new relationship, but did tell her friends. whoop-de-do. what a monster. seriously, was cheyenne your first girlfriend? had you never been in a relationship before? because this is all really, really run-of-the-mill stuff. you said you’re in therapy? find a new therapist, because this one isn’t helping you. and going through an ex’s e-mail account? that is creepy, and uncalled for, and whether or not what you found made you “sick” it was NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS! it would be nice if you had learned some lessons from this breakup, but it looks like you haven’t–so be prepared for a repeat experience.
December 24th, 2007 at 6:24 am
Hello feetontheair,
You have completely misread my story. Allow me to clarify:
1) The biggest confusion seems to be how you have chosen to interpret this blog. This is a place of personal expression. It is not divorce court. It is not a pissing contest to see who has the worst break up story. The story I told is a reflection of the way I felt when I wrote it. Whether or not my feelings are justified is a moot point. Obviously no one wants to go around with hate in their heart and this blog is one way to let go of those feelings.
Since you are speculating about my dating history, I was once in a relationship where the girl cheated on me (in your sense of the term). Then, when I broke up with her she spent months stalking and harassing me to the point where I had to have her arrested and taken away in handcuffs. If I wanted to win a pissing contest, I would have told that story. But I never hated that girl the way I hated Cheyenne. Hate is, by definition, irrational, but I think it has to do with Cheyenne’s hypocrisy. The girl who was stalking me was simply troubled and eventually apologized.
2) Cheyenne DID cheat on me. Only in the most purely juridical sense was this not cheating. If you’re sleeping in the same bed every night and having sex, that’s a sexual relationship. And it was still assumed to be a monogamous by all parties. Furthermore, she also cheated on Marl, which WAS cheating in the juridical sense.
3) You have misread me on feminism. I did use the term “feminist bullshit” but this was not meant to imply that all feminism is bullshit. Any school of thought can be abused. I think feminism is fighting human rights abuses in the Middle East, infanticide in China, and wage discrimination in America. Using it to justify selfish behavior trivializes that struggle.
4) Believe it or not, I have never been accused of being sexist. Granted, I did use the word “slut.” But if there is any situation when the word “slut” is appropriate, it is probably on a forum dedicated to hate when describing a woman who could have easily given me AIDS through her selfishness and deceit.
5) You also imply that I have no right to complain because other people also approach break-ups in selfish and immature ways rather than communicating like adults “(welcome to the world of dating, buddy.)” This argument is juvenile on three counts: A) when you live together and are shopping for wedding rings you are no longer in “the world of dating.” This constitutes a serious relationship, requiring serious communication. B) You are arguing that something can be justified solely by the number of people doing it. This is probably the greatest mistake throughout history. By that logic, rape, genocide, etc. can all be justified. C) This is a forum for describing everyday things that people hate. Are you going to go through every single post, arguing that people have no right to hate something because it happens everyday?
6) Yes, going through an ex’s e-mail account is “creepy.” But your judgment of me ignored the ten odd pages of context. It was literally a matter of life and death. After reading it, I went to the AIDS clinic and got tested. Anytime you are in a relationship where you are having unprotected sex and someone cheats on you—finding out is your business. Furthermore, if you were in my position you would have done the exact same thing. You would be stupid not to. Anyway, Homeland Security reads your e-mail everyday for far less important reasons.
7) You seem to frame your unsolicited advice by implying you are some sort of veteran dater: describing two years as a short relationship, suggesting that I have never had a relationship before, etc. Finally, you close your missive with an incredibly condescending line about “learning lessons.”
Now allow me to return the favor by speculating about you. I think that you have no ideals left. I think that you have made so many mistakes and been abused so many times that cognitive dissonance has forced you to be proud of it. You see “the world of dating” as a Hobbesian nightmare where selfishness is expected and actual honor and love are illusory. The only way to win this game is to surround yourself with a anesthetic wall of cynicism. I think that is the “lesson” you have learned. Congratulations.
January 18th, 2008 at 8:14 pm
Cheynne was abusive. She was in your head…which is where controlling abusers want to be.
MY estranged husband began that way. It ended recently after three children, sixteen years of marriage, his beating me and finally saying he dreamed he’d killed me. That day was the last day…his dream…was not going to come true.
You are smart. You are out. Please heal and take that wonderful heart to another more deserving person. They tell me they are out there….I hope you find her
May 2nd, 2008 at 9:22 pm
Take solace in the fact that she will most likely end up as an aids statistic. If she continues the way you described, her life will inevitably suck.