You are the one who makes it difficult to get up every morning.
You are the one my mind can’t stop plotting against.
You are the one who, although I must spend ¾’s of my life with, I can’t live without!
Arghhh… I hate everything about you!

You are the one that takes me to my lowest low and my highest high.
You are the one that makes me feel like I have made no progress in this world at all.
You are the one my friends tell me to leave.
You are the one I wish I could please more than any other.
You are the only way I can get where I want to go.
You are the difference between being sick and making me sick.
You are what makes my days awful and my nights worth living.
You are the rain on a sunny day.
You are the puppet in my hand when I curse at myself.
You are the demonic voice I hear when I think I’ve done well, and you tell me I’m not even close.
You have developed an art out of annoying and irritating others.
You are the stealer of my personal time.
You are the reason why I’m signed up on every junk mail list from here to kingdom come.
You copy every action and draw every little square you’ve ever chastised me for and use it as your own.
You are the one pushing all my buttons and still wondering what they do.
You are the one that makes me a butt of a joke that is never funny.
You are the one who, while raking the yard, I use my imagination to step on your feet and push you backward.
You are the one who says I have potential and then adds “not everyone gets to be an astronaut when they grow up”.
You are the one who tells me “If I can’t learn to do something well, learn to enjoy doing it poorly”.
You are the one whose appreciation and acceptance I am always striving for yet I know that the tallest blade of grass gets cut first.
You are the reason I always have to buy the cheap macaroni and cheese for my starving children.
You are the one who points at your wrist while asking me the time.
You are the one who says “Can I ask you a question” when you’re already doing it.
You tell me you want to see the “new and improved” me today, then never tell me what you want “new and improved”.
You are the one that keeps my head above water, at least that’s what you tell me.
You are the darkest door, and one that I have to open.
You are the chance of a lifetime.
You are the opportunity I have to change my life.
You are the reason my eyes hurt.
You are the reason my feet hurt.
You are the reason I have carple tunnel.
You are the reason my kids are growing up without a mother.
You are the reason society feels that mother’s don’t mean anything anymore… at least they’re not as important as you.
You are the reason I try so hard to do well.
You are the reason I try so hard to not do anything.
YOU are my boss and I Hate Everything About YOU!